| “ | Faceslam! | „ |
| ~ Crash's recurring catchphrase in every episode |
| “ | Yo, it's Crash at the door. Don't wait for you to open kick it down, Hardcore! I’m purple with a 'tude, Where your mom hide the food? (Wyatt: In the fridge), I'ma eat it, Then we tear it up, dude. (Wyatt: No makeup or feelings, Tea parties or dolls), Now it's ninjas and football, and face slams! (Wyatt: Good call!) | „ |
| ~ Crash's lyrics in the show's theme song, highlighting his mischievous antics. |
Crash Bernstein, otherwise known as Crash, is the titular anti-heroic protagonist of Crash & Bernstein (alongside Wyatt Bernstein).
He is a whatnot living puppet with many insane abilities such as eating sandwiches that are the size of basketballs and eating a watermelon with a straw, and he comes with ninja weapons, such as ninja swords and a small cannon.
He was puppeteered and voiced by Tim Lagasse.
His Good Ranking[]
What Makes Him Admirable?[]
- In "Educating Crash", Crash takes on Rufus aka The Slapper (the meanest kid in Linus Pauling Middle School), which helped make him and Wyatt popular and respected for facing the school's most feared bully.
- In "Release the Crashen", he helps the Bernsteins find a way to detach themselves away from obnoxious and oppressive neighbors like Gerry and Gretchen (who Gerry antagonized Wyatt and Crash by being a toxic friend). Crash does this by vandalizing their property to make them dislike the Bernsteins as they intended. He also humorously expresses sympathy for how disgusted Gerry's dog must've felt with Gerry kissing the dog's lips.
- In "Undercover Crash", defeating Doris; a sadistic con artist who fought Crash and Wyatt at the arcade, by getting Wyatt to throw Crash, and make him fly and slam into Doris from the back while she was trying to escape, which got the city's cops to come in and arrest Doris on the spot. Plus, Crash also returns the items he stole at the Arcade, like a cotton candy machine, a streetlight, and a plush frog with a camera on it. He also learns how and why it's bad to steal.
- In "Crashington", he helps Wyatt with taking care of Mel and the girls while they are all sick.
- In "Crashlemania", Crash helps Wyatt get back into wrestling class with help from Mr. Poulos when Wyatt gets kicked off the team due to Crash's reckless antics.
- In "Trash & Bernstein", he helps Wyatt and Pesto win a cup-stacking competition by using super speed and warping reality to his will, and so Wyatt can take on Cleo's "washing bathrooms for months" deal.
- In "Cold Hard Crash", despite getting carried away about being rich thanks to Mrs. Lopez leaving Crash her cats and a fortune in cash, he still helps Wyatt win against Scottie for President of the Snowboard Club by having Crash buy the election. He also evacuates Wyatt and his friends to avoid an avalanche that Crash had set up to blow at 12 PM.
- In "Crash Jacked", he helps get back Wyatt's bicycle that was stolen by Rufus. While Rufus kidnapped Crash and held him hostage to spite Wyatt, Crash uses his obnoxious destructive antics to make Rufus regret this decision and turn Crash's shenanigans into a form of karmic retribution for Rufus being humiliated for being a brutish thief, which helped Crash escape from Rufus and getting the bike back to Wyatt.
- In "Comic Book Crash", he and Wyatt (in their heroic roles as The Shredder and Mr. Purple) go retrieve Jumper, a basset hound that Jasmine has been dog sitting, from the dog thief. With some minor help from the Possum (played by Mr. Poulos), they defeat the dog thief, and Crash saves the dog.
- In "The Nosejob Job", he gets his hangout place back by pretending to be a victim of Wyatt tearing off Crash's "jelly nose" to terrify the tyrannical nerdy teenagers who took over Wyatt's and Crash's hangout area, into thinking Wyatt tore off Crash's bloody nose to make them retreat and defeat those teenagers from antagonizing Crash, Wyatt and Pesto.
- In "Crash is Having a Baby", he protected his egg son "Robert Downey Junior", by installing multiple net catchers to prevent the egg from falling splat on the ground when Bernstein constantly tried making it fall onto the ground.
- In "Home Alone... with Crash", he and Wyatt steal Mr. Poulos's keys and get the children to help Jasmine be freed from locking herself in a wall vent.
- In "Double Header", he defeated his pimple head, Tucker Taylor, from threatening Crash to usurp him and taking over "The Wyatt and Crash Show" on Linus Pauling Middle School's TV network.
What Makes Him Inconsistent?[]
- He is often a complete troublemaker and sometimes too much of a mischief-maker. He always enjoys causing trouble and havoc around him without thinking twice about his actions, tends to be incredibly childish, also enjoys pulling pranks on people (ex. dropping water balloons on Wyatt's mom in "Duck, Duck, Crash") and driving tons of countless people crazy by his daredevilish antics, which goes too far to the point he upsets several people with his recklessness and facetious behavior.
- He can also be a total extremist with his mischief since he usually makes really questionable decisions during his shenanigans in every episode (ex. vandalizing his school's wall by charging through a wall at school with a robotic cow he wrestled with as his way to get Bernstein out of trouble academic-wise with his class and also destroying everyone's bridge projects in "Like Father, Like Purple"), and his irrational decisions makes him come across as the subject of annoyance towards the Bernsteins and generally everyone in the town of Portland.
- He is also incredibly destructive, as his antics always lead to all kinds of property damage, such as the time he tried experimenting his motorcycle to fly off a cardboard ramp that ended up him vandalizing a part of a building in the episode "Crash the Man", putting a hole in a wall in "Crashlemania", or doing a gravity test with a crate and wheels to make himself fly from a slide and slam into a roof and a door in "Release the Crashen".
- He tends to be extremely incompetent and is not taken seriously as a hero. It doesn't help that he is incredibly immature and reckless, constantly putting himself and others on harm's way more often than not, his plans to help his friends are frequently foiled by his ignorance and inferior intellect, and his stupidity can sometimes cause inconvenience for his allies during missions, all of which automatically disqualifies him from Near Pure Good.
- He is quite arrogant and egotistical, especially in the episode "Educating Crash"; where he was so self-absorbed he claims that he's the "awesome" one who helps Wyatt deal with his sisters.
- He can also be rude, selfish and an abrasive jerk at times, where he typically has no shame in what he says and does, such as him heckling a school coach in "Coach Crash", acting too self-centered and irritable in a jealous fashion towards Wyatt's biological father in "Like Father, Like Purple", assaulting a news reporter with a kick out of petty anger because of Crash being called a 'sidekick' in "Comic Book Crash", and he carelessly stranded a frustrated astronaut without a rope into deep space in "Flushed Into Space" just for not being good at playing tag.
- He is a sadomasochist since he takes enjoyment over annoying or bullying Pesto or anyone around him with his pranks, yet he also enjoys having mud sprayed all over him as if it was a lucky miracle to happen to him in "Monster Crash", enjoyed the ride called The Decapitator and seems to be okay with getting his head decapitated in "Shorty Crash", cheerfully shouting multiple times for Bernstein to chuck him off the balcony again as if it's a rollercoaster for him before wanting to drop water balloons on his mom in "Home Alone...With Crash", appears to enjoy having trash dumped all over him (with a anvil dropped on his head) in his hangout area by a garbage man named Earl in "Trash and Bernstein" and Crash (with Wyatt) enjoyed bashing him each other with famous paintings of the Mona Lisa and The Starry Night in "Double Header".
- While his goal to help Wyatt live brotherhood, he behaves in a misogynistic way at times towards Jasmine, Cleo, Amanda and their friends in episodes like "Crashington", "Crash Crush" and especially "The Nosejob Job" (the latter having Crash show complete disgust over Amanda and her high school friends being in the living room where Wyatt and Crash chill out at, and he also showed complete paranoia in the fact Jasmine and her friends were all over the kitchen. Which is probably warranted since Amanda, Cleo and Jasmine all wanted boys out of Wyatt and Crash's usual hangout place and practically took over it so that it was filled with just girls).
- He also has an "on & off" side to his mischief. Where he also does many villainous deeds that are too cruel and corrupting, these include:
- He immediately committed his first act by destroying a bunch of the antiques, and in the same episode he tore down a wall in the apartment in "Crash Lands",
- He constantly makes fun of Bernstein's fear of bugs and even tried to cure him by putting bugs on him which just made it worse in "Scaredy Crash",
- Stole lots of items from the arcade in Portland without getting caught before he returned it such as stealing a cotton candy machine, a balloon from a crafts' fair, a dream catcher and even a streetlight that caused several car crashes in "Undercover Crash",
- Not to mention he got so greedy that he attempted counterfeiting his own money by printing money and attempted making his own currency of "Crash Dollars" (with his butt being on the back of his dollars) in the same episode.
- When he became coach, he overworked the boy's basketball team, even when they said they were tired he still made them exercise and he didn't have any remorse until they fired him in "Coach Crash" (as well as getting their original coach quit his job because of Crash mocking and jeering the coach),
- His idiotic questions and monkey business upon asking far-fetched and random questions to Cassie got her fired due to her frustration with Crash's lunacy in "Crash Ask Too Many Questions",
- Leaving a person stranded on an island without any thought or concern to tell anyone at the right time in "Escape from Bigfoot Island",
- Got carried away with getting greedy over Mrs. Lopez lending him her money while on a trip, Crash used a cannon to launch tons of cents and it causes destruction onto vehicles (as well as causing a snow avalanche) in "Cold Hard Crash",
- Acted as a bumbling villain who constantly attempted to murder Flex Fletcher, a action figure that Crash felt like he took Wyatt and Princess Glitter away from Crash himself, the only two people he truly cares about in "Crash Vs. Flex".
- In the entirety of the Pranksgiving series, his pranks are treated as antagonistic and is treated as a trickster villain who humiliates anyone with his pranks at their expense. He launched a grape-flavored snow cone at Leo Howard during his pseudo hypnosis act in "Hip-Hopnosis", getting Kenneth Faried to launch a giant paintball disguised as a basketball at Jake in "Turkey Ball", having four guys to mess with megaphones and then have purple lips from megaphones Crash planned in advance to trick them in "Bullhorn", getting Billy to have glitter blasted all over his drum set in "Different Drumstick", assaulting the actual barber who was doing Olivia Holt's hair before making her hair into a purple mess in "Bride of Frankenpuppet", and getting everyone covered over goo by slicing a turkey with goo to make a fool of his vengeful rivals Crash pranked earlier in "Turkey with a Side of Payback".
Trivia[]
- He is the only live-action Disney XD character to be approved as Inconsistently Admirable.
- He is the only character in Crash & Bernstein to be approved as Inconsistently Admirable.
- Ironically, his corrupting factors are what many people find enjoyable to watch and it's what made him fun to watch.
External Links[]
- Crash on the Heroes Wiki
- Crash on the Villains Wiki
- Crash on the Disney Wiki
- Crash on the Crash & Bernstein Wiki
- Crash on the Shonen Heroes Wiki
